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Wow. That makes it sound like I have a plan and all, doesn’t it?  Well I don’t.  Family holidays are pretty hit and miss around the old homestead.  I’m sure that’s true for everybody really, but we all think that our own home situations are extra special or different somehow.  But they really aren’t.

So how does the pirate code fit in to the holiday season?  I’m not sure yet.  Thursday is Thanksgiving.  As a kid part of me always wanted to protest the whole idea of Thanksgiving as a holiday – after all – some of those Natives getting stomped on were family, you know?  But the draw of stuffing and mashed potatoes and a gravy boat that really was seaworthy were just too much for poor me to handle.  I was hooked on the food (still am, actually).

The plan this year is as follows:

  • Train to Indiana on Wednesday following work.
  • Football.
  • Thanksgiving supper prep Thursday morning.
  • Football.
  • Thanksgiving supper eating Thursday afternoon.
  • Football.
  • Sleeping.
  • More Football.
  • Home to Chicago on Friday sometime.

Doesn’t sound too bad, right? Shouldn’t be.  I’ll admit though – there are a few pitfalls.  For one, I have no idea who is coming to dinner.  Usually I know all this beforehand, but this year I’m running blind. Also – football.  I like to sit and yell at the tv as much as the next gal, but I don’t know who’s playing.  I’d rather watch college football anyway.  Unless the Colts are on. They’re honorary pirates so we likes ’em. Worst case scenerio I can just knit and yell at the tv at the same time.  Also, Wednesday night is Bones, but I think mom may DVR it for me.  There’s another pitfall for Wednesday night – the ex and his band of doom.  I can’t help it – when I’m home and they’re playing locally I like to go see them.  I like the music, what can I say?  This year though, I may skip the annual trekking out to the boonies to see the ex’s band play for a few hours – not because I’m afraid of his wife (no matter how many times she threatens to beat me up in a bar – true story, I’ll share that another time) – but because of the smoking laws.  Indiana still allows smoking in bars. EW.  And really, I’d rather not have to come back to the house and take a shower before I go to bed just because my hair smells like smokey bar. Gross.

So despite the possible issues I think that Thanksgiving will be a good day to create a survival guide for the holidays.  I know the family worries about me sometimes.  Mom will ask how my mood is a bunch of times (I have depression issues, duh) and deep down I think that she thinks that I’m going to come home and introduce a new girlfriend from out of nowhere (she keeps hinting about how she’d really be okay with that – which is great, mom, thanks, but not necessary right now).  Dad’ll be great – he’ll ask if I’m still excited about school (yes) and if I’m still unhappy at work (sometimes).  If my sister and brother in law are around they’re fun too.  I don’t know why I worry about going back home – sometimes I think that the pressure I feel this time of year is all in my head.  Which is entirely possible.  But I guess we’ll just see, won’t we?

Besides – if they get really unruly I’ll just make them all walk the plank!

Yar!  And pass the gravy.